Media Hound

Delilah’s gotten a fair amount of press over the years. In some ways she’s the media darling I’ll never be — she’s smart, funny, attractive and isn’t too proud to beg.

She’s was prominently featured in an essay titled “Dog Days” that appeared in my book “What Size Are God’s Shoes.” The publisher liked her so much she even appeared in cartoon form on the cover. A digitized picture of her once accompanied an article I wrote for the Episcopal New Yorker (a version of which you can read here) and she made the local television news in New York running with me down Sleepy Hollow Road following a man-on-the-street interview. In other words, she is the ultimate media hound.

So it should come as no surprise that when Forward Movement announced they’d be publishing a 2012 Episcopups Calendar she jumped at the chance to be included. Yesterday was the photo shoot but before I get to that let me explain the calendar concept.

You see for years Forward Movement Publications has put out an Episcocats Calendar featuring cute shots of cats in all sorts of poses. People, presumably Episcopalians, submit pictures of their cats and hope to be one of the lucky twelve. It’s my understanding that the Episcocats Calendar has traditionally been one of Forward Movement’s cash cows — though they have not, to the best of my knowledge, ever released an Episcocows Calendar. (By the way, if you’re interested in learning how to submit your dog’s photo click here. But remember many are called, twelve are chosen).

When my archnemesis, Scott Gunn, seized the reigns of Forward Movement a few weeks ago he promised major changes and exciting new initiatives. I can only imagine that the Episcopups Calendar is one of these hot new ideas that will reimagine and reinvigorate the Church as we know it.

Anyway, the casting call for the new calendar has gone out. I’ve threatened Scott that if Delilah is not included I’ll never speak with him again. Unfortunately, he was encouraged by this “threat.” So I’ve had to submit Delilah’s picture under Bryna’s name to insure she’s not left out due to the spite of the one I like to refer to as the Rupert Murdoch of the Episcopal Church.

I won’t take this opportunity to malign Father Gunn’s character. He’s been a dog person for many years and, frankly, likes Delilah more than me. Though I do think that the only reason he got the position at Forward Movement was because he had a cat. What happened shortly after his enthronement was announced? His cat died. Hmmm. That’s suspicious.

Delilah workin' it during the photo shoot

I didn’t trust myself or anyone else in our family to preside over Delilah’s photo shoot. For this reason we brought in her official fashion photographer, our friend Christine Dietterich of CED Design. She took some great shots some of which I’m sharing here but, because of the extreme secrecy surrounding the Episcopups Calendar, I can’t post the shot we ultimately submitted. I’m thinking she’d make a great Miss January.


3 Comments on “Media Hound”

  1. Ev says:

    You’re so funny! I wouldn’t mind if she were Miss February as that is my birthday month and she is at least as beautiful as I. ahem

  2. Sarah Brockmann says:

    Aha. So it was an inside job. I ought to have known…

  3. Father Tim says:

    No it’s not, Sarah! There’s still time to submit pictures (through August 12th). I’ll admit that it’s a dog eat dog world out there but everyone stands a chance for inclusion.


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