Christians Burning Bibles?

burning_book

 

It seems I spoke too soon about Amazing Grace Baptist Church in Canton, North Carolina. I lampooned them yesterday for releasing their “list of athletes going to hell.” But it’s worse than I thought: on Halloween night they’re holding a good old-fashioned book burning. Of Bibles.

Yes, they believe that the King James Version of the Bible is infallible and all other translations are “satanic” and “perversions” of God’s word. Duh. Everybody knows that Jesus spoke in Elizabethan English. And that every utterance that came from his lips was written in red ink.

But don’t worry. Pastor Marc Grizzard and his merry men (one can only assume) won’t stop at burning Holy Scripture. They plan to burn books written by Billy Graham, Rick Warren, and Mother Thersa, among others, since they had the audacity to occasionally quote from versions other than the KJV. I’m considering sending a courtesy copy of my book, What Size Are God’s Shoes, down to Western North Carolina to add to the pile — after all, I quote the New Revised Standard Version on several occasions.

And of course they’ll also be burning “Satan’s music such as country, rap, rock, pop, heavy metal, western, soft and easy, southern gospel, contemporary Christian, jazz, soul (and) oldies.” This all comes from the church’s website which has now either crashed or been taken down. Unless they torched their own server in a preemptive strike.

The church, and I use that term loosely, claims to be inspired by this passage from the Acts of the Apostles:

“And many that believed came, and confessed, and shewed their deeds. Many of them also which used curious arts brought their books together, and burned them before all men: and they counted the price of them, and found it fifty thousand pieces of silver. So mightily grew the word of God and prevailed.” (Acts 19:18 to 20 — KJV, of course).

I, however, think the inspiration comes less from the Bible and more from the infamous Disco Demolition Night held at Chicago’s Comiskey Park in 1979. disco demo

All I can say to any “witches” living down in Canton, North Carolina: watch your back.


5 Comments on “Christians Burning Bibles?”

  1. Jay Angerer says:

    Tim, Thanks for the Monday morning laugh! One thing, though, are you saying that, In John 11, when Jesus asked to have the stone rolled away from the tomb of Lazarus, that Martha didn’t say, “he stinketh?”

    BTW, your blog is one of the few I read every week. Thanks for that.

    Peace

  2. Father Tim says:

    Thanks, Jay. Good question. Perhaps he actually said “THOU stinketh.” We’ll get the scholars on this one!

  3. Marguerite Alley says:

    Don’t forget classical music….most of that so called “sacred music junk” is in Latin, which according to the manual on Exorcism (from our RC friends) is the most effective language to use when coaxing out thos pesky evil spirits. Ergo, Latin must be Satan’s native tongue. That stinketh (at least from a classical musician’s perspective).

  4. Alec says:

    You should offer to help them hold a U2charist.

  5. Jean Halajian says:

    You can’t go home again.


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