Is Tom Brady Going to Hell?

flaming footballTalk about grace under fire. Amazing Grace Baptist Church in Canton, North Carolina, has released a list of athletes who are going to hell. I’m not sure whether satan holds press conferences to announce such things but evidently the pastor of this church does.

Topping the list is New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. “Tom Brady has an unwed child, but it’s okay because he wins Super Bowls,” proclaims the church’s web site. “Tom Brady is teaching us to have sex outside of marriage, to commit fornication, don’t marry and do the right thing, don’t take responsibility for your actions, have a good time no matter who you hurt in this world, go from sex partner to sex partner, and it’s okay because of who I am. How many of you dads cheer on Tom in the Super Bowl while your kids are watching?”

Also making the list:

Richard Petty: “Richard Petty’s god is racing, not God Almighty. He teaches that it is okay in life to cheat just don’t get caught doing it. Is Richard Petty your idol?”

Memphis Grizzlies forward Marko Jaric: “Engaged to the Victoria’s Secret supermodel (porn magazine) Adriana Lima.”

Wrestler Torrie Wilson:”Committed an abomination by kissing a female wrestler ‘Sable’ on the lips.”

The Chicago Bulls’ Joakim Noah: “Has long hair, which is disobedient to the Word of God.”

Arizona Cardinals backup QB Matt Leinart: “He is teaching teenagers not to save themselves for their spouse, but to live it up because you only live life once. Is Matt your idol?”

Football player Adam Archuleta: “Engaged to a Playboy Playmate Jennifer Walcott. They have one son. This is called fornication, and we all know what their son is called, the same thing the Bible calls him.”

In the Episcopal Church we tend to focus on lifting up those who have lived exemplary lives of faith. In contrast to the list of athletes going to hell, we have a little something called the Calendar of Saints. Athanasius might not be as glitzy as Tom Brady; FD Maurice might not be as titillating as Richard Petty; but  I think it’s a better use of our time to focus on the saints among us and let God sort out the rest.

As far as this list is concerned, where’s the “Amazing Grace” in that?


5 Comments on “Is Tom Brady Going to Hell?”

  1. Clare Hickman says:

    Hmmm, I try to keep on top of these sorts of things, but I missed the moment when the Bible suggested that it’s a problem to “have an unwed child” … I mean, it makes it more likely that he’ll be living at home and wanting me to do his laundry when he’s 32 years old, but I didn’t know it would make me a sinner!!

  2. Father Tim says:

    Clare, your problem is that you’re such a literalist! Re. their condemnation of Joakim Noah, it’s a good thing I got a haircut last week.

  3. A thought-not original but borrowed-“One does not become a Saint by worrying about the sins of others”.

  4. […] I spoke too soon about Amazing Grace Baptist Church in Canton, North Carolina. I lampooned them yesterday for releasing their “list of athletes going to hell.” But it’s worse than I […]

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