As I had trouble sleeping last night, I thought I would jot down some things that annoy me. Not being able to sleep didn’t make the list only because it produced this cathartic list. Perhaps I’ll start a new blog titled “20 Things that Annoy Me,” update it on a regular basis, sign a lucrative book deal, sell the movie rights, and star in the ensuing blockbuster film. I haven’t decided yet.
Some might say “Shouldn’t a priest focus on more positive things rather than dwelling on the negative?” To which I would respond, “If it weren’t for the goodness of God’s creation, coupled with the brokenness of humanity, I’d never have anything to say.” Wrap your minds around THAT impressive display of theology!
Anyway, in no particular order, here are 20 things that annoy me:
1. Folding fitted sheets
2. The Revised Common Lectionary
3. Post-Cold War Olympics
4. Stems on blueberries
5. The humorless
6. Most blogs
7. Cleaning up ferret poop
8. Prying kids off the XBox
9. Flavored coffee
10. Sloppy liturgy
11. Scott Gunn
12. Brown bananas
13. Shopping malls
14. People that hang out in shopping malls
15. The New York Yankees
16. The Housewives of New Jersey, Orange County, etc.
17. People who wish me Merry Christmas during Advent
18. Yappy dogs
19. Flies in the bedroom
20. My third grade teacher
Believe me, I could go on. But with heroic restraint I have limited myself to 20. Be careful — this might become a regular feature here!